I have to admit, I’ve been sparse for ideas lately for this blog.
Faithfully writing for over 6 years on every topic revolving around kink that my wicked mind can come up with, sometimes leaves me starting at a blank screen. Tonight however, a fresh topic presented itself – and one that I’ve never quite zero’d in on in any sense for those visiting a dominatrix….
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How to calm your nerves BEFORE you knock on her door!

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Yeah yeah, I’ve written about working up the courage to play, and I recognize that’s never easy, but tonight as I sit, having just cleaned up my dungeon for a session I’ve just had to decline – I feel annoyed, time wasted, but this is a VERY teachable moment.
So, before I jump into some helpful hints, let me tell you what just happened…
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A brand new visitor experienced a very common and human moment, getting VERY nervous about the idea of knocking on my door, so much so, that he found himself turning to happy hour at a nearby bar; not 40 minutes before arriving for his piercing session. He emailed me to simply let me know, and welcomed me to join. Now, I don’t know this gentleman – and he didn’t *ask* me if I’d mind; rather he just informed me that he’s going to have a few drinks before our meeting.
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Now, it’s pretty well-known that booze and BDSM don’t mix, especially with any form of blood play and ESPECIALLY if I haven’t met you. You’re still a stranger from the internet coming to my very private, guarded space. Respect and polite presentation will keep us mutually safe.
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So what can you do if you’re starting to feel unreasonably anxious before a booking? I’ve got some ideas for you, but first just take a breath…anxiety is normal and you’re going to be JUST fine!
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1) Turn fear into excitement! Go back to your chosen Top’s website or social media account and indulge yourself in some sexy photos, maybe even some self tease and denial. Remind yourself of how much fun you’re going to have and why you picked them in the first place!
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2) Use logic!  Most people research a LOT before jumping into something like this, remember that you’ve likely chosen this person to get naughty with you because you have a lot in common, because you approved of her skill level, reviews, reputation and play space. She’s not a totally foreign entity to you and probably has a traceable web presence. Put your trust in her presence and skill!
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3) If you have the time, distract yourself! Run some errands, watch some porn, do literally anything else but dwell on unsettled nerves! Some people are wired to worry, but you control how much focus you put into those feelings. If you can accomplish something else with that tightly wound energy, why not!
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4) Call her.  Seriously. In the case above, if my client were so scared to knock on my door that he needed to inebriate to take the edge off, I would have liked a chance to take 5-10 minutes to quell those feelings and reset the course. Sex workers are AMAZING at putting you at ease, if you need to tap into that – most would welcome that option. Communication and positive rapport really build a foundation for incredible scenes!
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5) Rehearse dialog and requests. Even if you’ve emailed with her, she’s likely going to sit you down and ask you’re likes and dislikes in more detail, injuries, allergies and maybe a few other things. She’s trying to decode you in a matter of minutes to give you a highly tailored and attuned scenario. If you want to get the most out of your playtime; open up and tell her! It’ll be MUCH easier to think it through and give great answers if she’s not staring at you with thigh high boots and a plunging neckline. Make that hyper focus benefit you in the best way possible!
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Of course, even the most well prepared partner will still feel a racing pulse as he approaches her doorstep, but just remember – the domination has already begun! She has you quivering yet complying, and THAT sort of power exchange is simply intoxicating enough in itself.
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Dearest Readers,

Today’s blog post I write from my gorgeous sunny back yard, procrastinating a bit on moving forward with some much needed work on my yard and garage, I suddenly realize there’s no better time to expand a bit on some thoughts I’ve had this season – than literally RIGHT NOW. (can you tell I don’t want to weed today?)  With new clients starting to take hold of their sexual destinies, novices coming out of the woodwork and seasoned clients begging for the next step – it’s really time I sit down and address some common fears and questions that daily float through my inbox. Hopefully, for those of you out there wrestling with nerves or self doubt, I can put some of those rampant worries to rest here.

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So without further procrastination….

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20 THINGS YOUR DOMINATRIX REALLY  WANTS YOU TO KNOW

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1. We REALLY DO want you to have fun.

I know the common theme in BDSM is that you’re coming to us to be punished, tormented, violated or degraded (or something on a softer scale), but regardless of what images pop to mind when you think ‘Dominatrix’; we don’t want to crush you into dust. Even if we’re doing some questionable and obscure things with your flesh – we’re playful creatures and we want you to like what’s happening! Ultimately we’re here to facilitate your personal exploration in whatever form that takes.

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2. Your nervousness is charming, but really not necessary.

Maybe it’s just me, but I adore the sight of a man who’s slightly trembling, don’t you? But trust me, we aren’t about to eat your alive and we’re experts on making you feel comfortable right off the bat. We completely understand that it can be nerve wrecking to come into a strangers studio, openly share the most intimate parts of your sexuality and within moments be ready to entrust us with your bodies to navigate the dark waters of kink.  More than anything, we want you to feel at ease and comfortable with yourself, with us and with your interests; so most professional sex workers are pretty adept at helping you get over any jitters you might have. Don’t think for a second we’re going to allow your anxiety to get in the way of our good time! If we can see your anxiety is hindering you, we’ll adapt to make you comfortable.

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3. We really don’t have a preference for age, race, personality, stamina, body type, physical abilities, lifestyle or other  characteristics.

Really, truthfully, and from the bottom of my heart I say this…

Most sex workers don’t have any sort of preference or leaning to one ‘type’ of person or another when to comes to our clients. What we care about is how much fun we’re going to have with you – okay and hygiene and politeness count pretty high too. Don’t think you need to ‘perfect’ yourself before you offer up your body for play. You’re wonderful just as you are!

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4. We don’t expect you to plan your own session, but we LOVE when you bring ideas to the table.

If you’re new, believe me, we aren’t expecting you to have a mapped out idea of how you’d like your scene to go. We just need a hint as to what you’re most curious for. After that, we’re here to fill in those blanks for you.
After that intro scene, we adore when our returning clients come to us with inspiration! It can be hard over time to constantly come up with new and creative ways to play if you become a solid regular, but keeping things fresh by letting us know how your interests are evolving is a massive and much welcome help!…and no, we don’t see that as topping from the bottom.

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5. Dommes are real women.

Most of us have very normal lives outside of this and aren’t looking to poach every single client for our own live in harem of slaves. We don’t hate men, don’t live the easiest life imaginable and certainly don’t feel self entitled because we’re “Alpha’s” by profession or any other stereotypical nonsense like that. Pro Dommes are hard working people who put in a lot of effort to running a businesses – just like you do. I assure you, outside of the dungeon, we have a very healthy view of the world and in all other ways, function as creative but fully integrated members of society.

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6. We enjoy your connection, but we are only your Domme ‘professionally’.

Unless you’ve been personally invited into the private world of your Mistress, just remember that you’re initially soliciting a Mistress for her ability to expand your horizons – on a professional level. You responded to her advertisement and you chose her based on her looks, her offerings, her tribute and her presentation: not for her hopes, dreams, personality or life goals (and we know this). As your trust and relationship deepens, just remember to keep your feet on the ground. It’s entirely natural to feel devoted and personal with your Dominatrix, but never forget that you didn’t meet her on e-harmony and most of us have a firm policy on not dating our clients. We don’t want to life the veil and explain why something ‘further’ might not be possible, so just keep your expectations in perspective.

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7. Most dungeons are relatively safe places to be.

There’s a reason most people go to a pro when they have something they want to act out; it’s because we’re skilled, equipped and clean. Now, this isn’t true in EVERY dungeon, but in most; you can count on a HIGH level of care and professionalism. We go to great lengths to ensure your safety in all ways, and that includes using quality toys/tools, learning correct practices and always sterilizing things after each and every visitor. If you look close enough, most practitioners are more than happy to tell you *exactly* what their process is to ensure safety and sanitation. If you’re curious or have doubts – just ask! You have the right to know how the equipment used on you is kept and handled.

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8. We want you to stay focused and in the moment.

You can check your phone, talk about your kids/work or mentally plan your grocery list any other time….but not with us. Don’t be surprised, offended or disappointed if we try to keep your head in the game and stray away from discussions that don’t have to do with the naughty fun we’re trying to share with you. This is OUR time; unless there’s an emergency, everything else can wait.

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9. We can really keep a secret!

I heard a joke along time ago that there are three types of people in this world you can tell your secrets too. Your priest, your lawyer and your sex worker. It’s true, in all instances what we do requires secrecy. It’s not a privilege, that would be appreciated… It’s a stone cold demand. We’ve got no interest in sharing the details of what happens behind closed doors with anyone else. Not just for your sake, but for our own as well. We believe that EVERYONE has the right to keep their private business private; and a huge part of what we do is treating you with the same amount of discretion as we expect in return. Consider our lips sealed!

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10. But, you still need to be cautious.

This should be obvious, but please don’t save our numbers to your phone under any obvious heading (Miss V, Domina, etc), delete your emails and don’t text anything you wouldn’t want your friends or significant other reading.
I can’t tell you how many times I’ve been contacted by someones girlfriend, wife or buddy because my client happened to forget to hide or remove incriminating correspondence from their email or phone. While I gave nothing away and played ‘dumb’ about who those clients were, we really don’t appreciate having our own privacy violated like that – and having to deal with an upset, curious, questioning or threatening individual at the same time. Keep a clean trail and you won’t have anything to answer for!

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11. We know you’re not all named John.

It’s shocking I know, but after my first dozen or so clients – I realized that it’s statistically impossible for you to ALL be John, Mike or Mark. You don’t need to give us your real first name if that makes you uncomfortable, but if you insist on using a terribly common moniker, be aware that we won’t be able to tell who you are when you call or email.

On the note of names, if you choose a fake name, stick to it… We don’t mind, but nothing confuses us more then when you’re John when you call, Josh when you email and Craig when you knock on the door. At some point, we’ll just revert to calling you ‘darling’ because we’ve got no clue what form of address you prefer.

Pro Tip: it’s totally cool to introduce yourself by the name of your favorite character, actor, singer or anything like that…. I’d love to dominate a Marcellus Wallace one of these days.

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12. We can use your time however you’d like.

No two clients like to use their time in the dungeon the same way, but if you book 2 hours, you’re welcome to use those 2 hours any way you’d like! Really – we won’t insist on any particular pace and we tend to stick to a common formula (10 minutes talk/prep, then play, 10-15 minutes aftercare/shower/post scene chat) if you don’t specify another way.

There’s nothing wrong with wanting a talk only or play only scene so long as you stay within the hours you’ve scheduled so don’t be afraid to speak up if you have a certain way you like to indulge!

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13. We appreciate it when you respect our private lives. 

Being so terribly and immediately intimate with a stranger can be a bit tricky, so many sex workers compartmentalize things in order to keep ‘work’ and ‘life’ vastly separate. We don’t mean to offend or keep you at an unnecessary distance; but for the same reasons you may not expand on the details of your day to day lives; we prefer the same privacy. Unless either side volunteers information, it’s best neither of us pry.

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14. If we cancel your appointment, please don’t take it personally. 

When you’re the thrill someone’s been looking forward to after a long day or week, we know how much of a downer it can be when we need to cancel or move our appointment. We don’t want to let you down, so we try at all costs to avoid that whenever possible.

However, if we’re sick, low energy or something pops up, we may elect to reach out to you so as to ensure we’re at 100% for our precious time together. We know you work hard for your money and that you trust and value the respite and excitement we offer; so it’s not fair to take your tribute just because we can if we’re not every bit the focused, erotic and Dominant woman you’ve come to expect. If we contact you to move our date a bit, it’s not because we don’t want to play with you – it’s just because we’re not physically or mentally ready and able to rock your world.

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15. Our compliments can be genuine!

There’s a cliche in sex work, but not all of us give empty compliments to our playmates. If we say something – we mean it. Don’t be too quick to write our words off because this is a professional exchange. There’s still a living breathing woman under all the leather and latex and sometimes, she has some nice things to say to and about her visitors….and sometimes she thinks you need to hear them!

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16. We really don’t judge.

As long as you’re a gentleman; what you say, how you act and what you enjoy isn’t going to change our view of you at all. If you’re a day to day 9-5, well polished, professional business and family man, I’m not going to see you differently when you tell me you like to be diapered, fisted and tied in an exposing position. You can be all of those wonderful things, with a vibrant erotic life. That’s totally okay! Your kinks don’t define you as a person.

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17. We can only read what you express.

Have you ever wondered how your Mistress always seems to do just the right thing at just the right time? When to whisper something controlling into your ear or deliver that next perfectly placed cane stroke?

Well frankly my dear, it’s because we tend to play with very emotive partners – and we LOVE when you’re responsive! Having someone writhe and moan beneath you as you conquer every inch of their body is incredibly intoxicating to us. Not only does it serve as pure gasoline for your Femme Domme’s fire, it also let’s us know how you’re receiving that interaction (when it’s good, bad or overwhelming) and having that sort of physical dialog helps us read you like an open book. You don’t have to keep your mouth shut while you suffer (or enjoy) our ministrations. Make a little noise; help us read you!

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18.  We really don’t mind if you’re a novice or still feeling out if BDSM is right for you. 

Not every client we see knows definitively whether or not they’re actually kinky. You can be brand new or even just mildly curious and still have a great time in our dungeon – we won’t be bored with your questions or hesitance! Sure, playing with a partner who’s done this for a while does have its merits, but we absolutely LOVE being the one to break you in if we happen to be your first Dominatrix.

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19. No, BDSM isn’t all about pain – pain free sessions absolutely exist – and yes, we like those too!

Don’t worry, we don’t have a one track mind and we aren’t bent on making you endure a session you’re not interested in. We love softer scenes and there’s a SLEW of things we can do that are more focused on other forms of domination, pleasure and control. Every now and then it’s massively fun for us to tone things down and facilitate something a bit more sensuous. Remember, we are very multifaceted creatures, even if that isn’t immediately apparent!

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20. We are happy with our daily lives.

While all of this stays professional for the safety and sanity for everyone involved, I’d be lying if I didn’t admit to really enjoying my visitors and regulars. I’ve met some of the most wonderful, thoughtful, entertaining and lovely people that I’d not have otherwise crossed paths with, and I’m so grateful we have the time together that we do. I look forward to your visits, truly and genuinely and I think of you (or rather what I’d like to do to you) when you’re not here. You are more then just a list of visitors I’m seeing this week, you’re my kinky friends and pervy pets – and I’m so thankful for your existence.

Now, on that note, it’s time for me to slip back into my sandals and sunglasses and get some work done, but you bet your sweet well spanked asses that as I pluck these weeks, I’ll be thinking of plucking all of you instead!

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So, I’ve known about Mistress Matisse and her magical trail blazing ways for years; BDSM Icon, Writer, Educator, Activist and about a hundred other accolades you could pin to her corset; she’s the ‘go-to’ gal for all things erotic and wonderful here in Seattle – and this is just a fact. Never one to simply sit back on her Empire and relax, she’s gotten together with a seriously skilled coalition of individuals to create something exceptional for us to enjoy in the bedroom. (She’s such a giver!)
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I had the chance to sit down with her very recently to talk about that new product (soon to be product line), Velvet Swing, and how its been a game changer for women’s orgasms! Still brand spanking new, but spreading like wild-fire, this particular lube is supposed to be the end-all, be-all for the 80% of women who are sensitive to its ingredients. Basically, for a large portion of the population – it promises to make you cum harder, longer and better. Do I have your undivided attention?
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Now, I’m not one to endorse anything outright, so I went and picked up a bottle (available here) and decided to see if I was one of those luck 80%. Who wouldn’t?
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This is a cannabis based lube but will NOT have mentally intoxicating effects if used as vaginally (orally and anally WILL intoxicate), so I slid into bed, applied as directed and waited a few minutes (okay maybe more like 30 – longer than I needed to but I found a great vid on pornhub). The first thing I did notice was a very obvious but pleasant tingling, it wasn’t distracting or numbing but more like a sensation of a thousand fingers gently touching me; I locked on to that fantasy and started The Real Test….
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Now normally, I can get off pretty quickly, easily and as much as I’d like, with the first orgasm being the strongest and subsequent experiences trickling down in intensity, like most multi orgasmics, until they’re an exhausted flicker. I had hoped, at most, this lube might make those subsequent explosions a little more vivid.
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Instead, the first one was absolutely primal! There’s no other way to say it, I didn’t get off with just my lovely lady bits, but my entire core! It was fuller, definitely a full couple of seconds longer and honestly left me totally ‘done’. I’m sure if I waited a bit to recover, I could have hopped right back on that horse and gone again, but I was so stunned that and gratified that I didn’t try; further testing in various ways is clearly needed!
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So, in conclusion, this is now an official staple for me in the bedroom (and hell, I’ll be carrying it in my purse, my car, I’ll have spares on me at all times!) While this product is aimed mostly at female identified individuals; results have been reported by the manufacturer in men as well, including longer sustained pleasure and very often, a very strong ‘fuller’ climax. Believe me, they’re aiming towards something male specific too; but as you might expect from a Dominatrix; ladies first!
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In the meantime, if you’d like to roll the dice and see just what your erotic body is capable of or perhaps give the lady in your personal life a seriously amplified orgasm – stop by one of the many shops currently carrying Velvet Swing or start exploring for more information, reviews and updates on their website or social media.
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*Not available online
*Currently only sold in Wa
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*Disclaimer: This blog posting is simply my personal opinion. I have not been paid, bribed or even asked for my commentary. This is my experience with a product that I deeply enjoyed. I’m not a doctor, scientist or wizard; just a woman who likes to cum hard.

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Another year, another excuse to celebrate like the hedonistic libertine that I am (as though I really need an excuse?)
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Blowing out candles lodged deeply into the orifices of my slaves, paintball wars featuring my Femme Domme friends and our unarmed, naked playmates in the woods and a host of unwholesome, yet thoroughly satisfying misdeeds will signal the celebration of yet another Birthday. And so, now that my 30 day countdown to July 19th begins, I’m once again easing into the annual tradition of using the next month to indulge my every whim and desire with absolute reckless abandon which really sets the tone for the entire year to come.
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It comes in perfect timing as only recently I threw myself headfirst into a kid in a candy store style shopping spree, loading up on new toys, new rubber outfits, various forms of confinement and contraptions I’d somehow not yet seen or snatched up, and it’s begun pouring in piece by piece! That sadistic overwhelming energy has started bubbling up inside me to a breaking point with each new package left on my doorstep.
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As busy as I normally am, especially this time of year, what I always want most is to spend time playing with those I enjoy playing with in the dungeon. As life and obligation often make this a tricky time of year for my favorite visitors to sneak away, I encourage you to make your excuses and sacrifice yourself body and mind for this celebratory occasion. What more can any Dominatrix want than to dish out her favorite torments on those she adores most?
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Though, if you’re the sentimental type who’s inclined to send your well wishes my way or simply offer a polite token of gratitude, I do have some specific ‘wants’ this year should anyone be so tempted to indulge me….
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Keeping in mind that NONE of this are expected, nor really even encouraged, I’m blessed to have thoughtful suitors who have already started to ask what I may be most happy to receive and for once, I’m going to get VERY specific.
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1. Donations to animal shelters or adopting an animal for yourself in my honor.
(Animal Hope & Wellness, ASPCA or Seattle Humane Society – preferred charities)
Anyone who really knows me beyond my whips and razor-esque attitude will know that I have a soft spot for animals; helping them is serving me.
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2. Latex – I need more, but I can’t settle on a ‘what’. Gift certificates to WestwardBound, Regulation Latex or unique bondage items, vac beds/bags, unusual rubberized bondage are all at the top of my ‘must have’ list.
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While I’d think this is more service oriented than humiliating, I can see the designers intent and can easily imagine having any number of devoted pets locked in tight predicament bondage while stumbling around the dungeon attempting to clean up or stand by in service with this tightly poised in their mouth.
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4. The Gift Of Travel
This is a hard one to give, but if you’re sitting on Alaska Airlines Miles, hotel vouchers or simply a good old-fashioned gift card (Hotels.com or Alaska Air), I’d be a very happy recipient. Please note that I’m unwilling to offer my personal details for any such transfer for obvious privacy and discretion. Direct tributes specifically for trips are also warmly accepted.
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5. Items from Regulation
Yes, I mentioned them in my quest for rubber, but they’re much more than a purveyor of latex. Actually, they have EVERYTHING and I have an invitation only list to share with anyone curious to browse. Contact me for details.
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Truly and seriously, no one need bring or send me anything because another year has passed. While that does seem to be the impulse, especially with those who feel submissive to me in particular; just know that I already feel very special just to have you in my life.
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I know that I’m blessed to simply have such an enjoyable career, lovely playmates and such a wonderful audience. Your attention and devotion is all I really *need* in my life, and I am endlessly pleased to have it. I hope July ends up being as wonderful a month for all of you as it is bound to be for me. Here’s to many reasons for us all to celebrate and many photos of the wicked fun to come!

 

I’ll come right out and say it, I love novices.

Admittedly, with my schedule often dominated by my dearly beloved regulars, I don’t have as much time as I used to for such appointments. However, this month I’ve been graced with some thoroughly amazing encounters featuring brand spankin’ new playmates. Let me tell you, it’d just been the most revitalizing experience.
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I’ve always had a particular place in my heart for the nervous newbie, and that stems from a certain bit of confidence I have in my ability to help people be a bit more self accepting. Despite all appearances, I’m a nurturer at heart and seeing someone embrace that part of themselves for the first time, and being able to facilitate that, simple makes my heart swell.
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You have to admit, there’s something romantic about taking a reluctant, shy or simply inexperienced partner and creating the moment that makes them eager to dig a little deeper within themselves. For that reason alone, the way I structure a first appointment is like no other…and for any of you teetering on the decision of taking the plunge with me, let me break that down for you a bit.
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At its core, a first time scene structurally consists of putting you at ease with me, helping you feel accepted in your sexuality, and then taking whatever fantasies or interests you have and giving them to you exactly; all within the bounds of you comfort level. In that sense, a first appointment is unlike any other. I’m here to take you where you need to go, where you might have been waited ages to go. I want to satisfy the long held urge, to indulge the curiosity, to show you that fantasy and reality can often intertwine just beautifully and give you a taste for more… that’s the point. Unless of course, your kink IS to be pushed to your very edge from the beginning!
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All the boundary pushing, edging towards distant, deviant goals and heavier play can come later. The first time, the deflowering,  it’s all about pure unadulterated satisfaction. It can be nerve wrecking to build up the courage to contact me in the first place, but whatever imagined intensities and fears that keep you from reaching out; you can safely set them aside.

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Those scenes are pure joy for me! While my playmate is reveling in that gratification, I get to sit back and absorb all that beautiful energy. Absolutely everything I do to them is virgin territory, I am their first and I get to be the one to share those incredibly personal and meaningful moments. It’s bliss….and I eat it up like candy.
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I’ve made a point for a while now to mention in various ads and portions of my website, that you don’t need experience to come see me. Those seem to be comforting words and I’m glad for that. Everyone starts somewhere and there’s no measure of experience one must have to be considered “ready” to visit a Pro Domme. You are fine just as you are…Really, in every sense!

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Believe me my dear virginal suitors, even I, after all these years, still have a flutter in my heart when I cross a new client. I might have the intuition to quickly sort out what they need and how they need it to be given, but this isn’t because I’ve had years of scenes under my belt, it’s because I live in the moment and in those moments, those people, their bodies, their rapid heartbeats and baited breath, tell me everything I need to know when I speak the right words or tie them up in just the way they were so deeply hoping that I would: it all becomes clear.
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You are no more or less prepared to meet me, then I am to meet you. The only difference, is that I am always up for it….but it’s on you to initiate first contact.
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Now, shall we get better acquainted?
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The slick sensual friction of latex, covering my body – and yours – bound tightly in a pose that forces to watch my rubber clad form surround you, preying on your lustful, hungry, glances.
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You struggle in my sleep sack, or rubber straight jacket, my hoods encasing your face, forcing you to breathe the intoxicating scent . It’s almost too much for you, but yet everything you need; you squirm to no avail, forced to surrender….
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The fantasy of the rubber fetishist is often, at it’s core, quite simple – it’s a need – a longing to be a creature enveloped in shiny second skin. Sleek and tight, perfectly glistening and crinkling with every measured motion, it’s truly one of the most encompassing of kinks – and naturally by extension, it’s become one of my deepest obsessions.
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As you might have noticed, over the past few years, my collection of all things tight and shiny has grown dramatically, to the point where I think a post detailing some of my specialty equipment is in order… I can’t tell you how many sweet suitors have scoured my site to read up on what I have in store, only to be VERY pleasantly surprised that what they read, only scratched the surface…. This definitely leads me to believe that not only am I being a bit too modest on what lies in my opulently adorned play space, but I am leaving out quite a bit of potential and went fantastic explorations might be possible…and that simply will not do!
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So, you’re curious enough to keep reading, likely already imagining the impossibly tight fabric crawling over every inch of you; let me spike your appetite and let your mind wander just a bit more.
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A look inside…

Rubber Body Bag
Rubber Inflatable Bondage Bag
Rubber Straight Jacket Body Bag
Rubber Straight Jacket
Rubber Mummification Bag with Access Holes
Full Isolation Rubber Hood w/ optional breath play holes
Latex Vac Bed (currently awaiting repair)
7 Latex Fitted Latex Hoods
2 Specialty Heavy Duty Rubber Gas Masks
6 Rubber Gas Masks
6 Heavy  Rubber Bondage Straps
50 Ft of Rubberized Rope
3 Rubber Gags
1 Inflatable Rubber Gag
2 Breath Play Rubber Gags
1 Cock Gag
2 Rubber Suction Pumps
5 Rubber Urethral Prods
2 Rubberized C**k Rings
Rubber Venus 2000 Sleeves
Rubber Gloves
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…and of course, a personal wardrobe with enough latex to dress an entire All Girls Catholic School!
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So, whether you’ve been curious to try rubber play or simply know this is already right up your alley and want to dive into an extraordinary collection – I have all the gleaming toys and tools to rival just about any collection around…. and more than enough expertise to help you melt other kinky leanings into this particular fetish with absolute shiny seamless precision.
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Shall we indulge?

 

 

4 years ago, I shared a blog post detailing the ‘how to’s’ and ‘how to not make a mess’, regarding anal play.

Funny enough, it became one of my most popular posts! Being reblogged and shared as a guide across other platforms and provider websites, I was very happy to be able to shed some light on a tricky topic and I really do hope it helped people enjoy more comfortable and immersive experiences.

This was still some time ago and I know how easy it is for posts to get lost in a sea of naughty writings, so I’m starting my Thursday with strap on play in mind, to once again share the important concept of being properly clean and hygienic during anal invasion; so buckle up – I’m about to get a little graphic.

For those who think prep beyond a shower really isn’t necessary before you take on a nice thick 9in dildo, expertly wielded by a fierce Femme Domme; I always like to use a short analogy.

 

Imagine you’re cleaning up after a dinner party and you’ve served a dish that’s a bit…messy…

 

Just because you scrape the food off the plate and into the trash doesn’t mean the plate is now ‘clean’. You already know you’re going to have to rinse it off – or hell, run it through the dish washer before you’re going to offer it to someone else or put it back in the cabinet, right? You’d be a pretty bad host if you didn’t!

If I rub anything like a finger or napkin (or dildo) across that dirty plate – what do you think is going to happen?

 

While many lovers of back door play tend to not be too terribly shy about a little mess, (hey, it is what it is) there’s no reason to simply use the bathroom and say ‘oh, that’ll be good enough!’

Nothing brings sexy fun to a screeching halt more quickly than having to grab some towels and excuse your partner to the bathroom to ‘clean up’. Preparing for anal penetration does take a bit of time and patience, but is SO worth the effort – and your partner will REALLY appreciate (if not demand) it. 

So where do you start?

 

First, shake off any embarrassment, stigma or hesitation in the topic itself. Anal is FUN and getting ready for it shouldn’t be a humiliating chore – it should be a part of a sexy ritual. Just like we all typically brush out teeth or jump in the shower before we get wrapped up in an intimate moment, this is just another step in the process, so let’s just remove any shame before we move on.

Being in an age of sexual evolution, we’re graced with TONS of methods of prep – from pills and drinks, to different devices and tools, it’s all out there and easy to get a hold of. Being so spoiled for choice can of course, be a double-edged sword if you’re just getting started, so I’lll share that my favorite method: plain and simple, a good old-fashioned enema.  It’s quick, clean, cheap and easy on the body – also the most universally used and agreed on across the board.

 

For your first time, you can buy a disposable Fleet brand enema for $2 at any drug store.

This is great if you don’t want to (or can’t) store any equipment around the house. Now, these do contain saline, so if your concerned with using chemicals, you can dump out the fluid and fill the container with water before moving forward. DO NOT ADD SOAP! Water works just as well and won’t leave you feeling dehydrated.

 

If you’d like to be a bit more thorough and give yourself more than one rinse, you can buy one of those fancy schamcy at home enema kits ($10-$30)

These are pretty great, but they might be a little intimidating or inconvenient for a first timer. Try to veer towards the easier option at first with the Fleet style until you’ve done this at least once. Bag style enemas will usually require a place to hang the bag, though you can really just hold it up with your hand, but think that out before you buy.

 

You can also find bulb style enemas just about everywhere – but personally – I don’t find these to be very sanitary unless they’re made of medical grade silicone. 

Most of them are made of porous plastic – which is not possible to THROUGHLY disinfect. You can wash them out with soap and water but I wouldn’t stick anything inside myself that I wasn’t SURE is thoroughly clean. If you buy bulb style enemas – consider them disposable and single use unless the package VERY specifically says it’s MEDICAL GRADE SILICONE.

 

 

Another workable choice if you’re just doing a routine clean out, is a more permanent fixture, like a nice shower attachment. Personally, I don’t find it to be terribly sanitary to release any sort of waste in the shower, but if you like this method – I won’t personally stand in your way – it’s your shower after all! I’ve heard nothing but great things about this unit in particular:

 

 

Timing is everything, so the first time you give this a go, make sure it’s AT LEAST 2 hours prior to play. If you hear nothing else I’m saying to you, register that last statement. At least 2 hours – I’m serious!!!!

As someone who’s been on the wrong end of a not fully expelled enema, I can attest that you NEVER want to do this right before or during the session unless you’re highly experienced; even then, there’s still a risk of leakage. Once the enema water hits body temperature, it can be very hard to tell if you’ve gotten it all out of your system and you don’t want any spills to occur once you get going.

Time is the only thing to ensure proper expulsion has happened. You’ll need to do this once or twice to really get the feel of things and read your body’s signals.

Enemas will always win in my book: they’re safe, reliable, cheap and easy. Just find what works for you, read the instructions and be gentle.

 

Last but not least, let me also give you a bit of uncommon advice…

You might be sitting there and thinking these steps are just too inconvenient or that you can just ‘skip’ it…. or if you’re a provider on the other end of the dildo, you might not want to enforce this step. If that’s your stance, imagine the worst case scenario (pulling out a very dirty dildo during a scene) and mentally work through how you’ll handle the situation without embarrassing yourself or partner.

I’ve been there and HOW you two handle it can make or break a scene. What will you say? How will you gracefully dismiss yourself to the restroom to ‘clean up’ – how will you discreetly hide or discard a very soiled toy? (hint: have medical pads on hand) How will you laugh it off, clean your partner up, break the tension and continue playing in other ways? Just think it out.

If you do anal play enough it WILL at some point happen. It just will – consider it part of the territory. It’s not the apocalypse, but it’s better to have a plan then to be caught like a deer in headlights trying to not break the scene.

Now if I haven’t scared you off – or even if I have – I’ll just remind you that despite these steps and considerations, anal play is utterly amazing. As a ‘giver’, I never feel more powerful, sexy and in control than when I’m pegging someone. It’s just really erotic – what can I say?

As a receiver, it’s clearly just as pleasurable – you’re being violated, taken and explored in the most sensual and intimate way possible – what’s not to love? Even if the prep to get there doesn’t become your favorite past time, just remember that anal feels good; reallllly good and even if these little intimate extras seem a bit foreign at first, you’re penetrative play will be SO much better for the effort.

Now, happy pegging!