Today was my day off and I was at my new home, painting the basement. I happened to make my way up the stairs to wash my hands just in time to catch my phone ringing. It wasn’t an inconvenience in any way, so I decided to answer. I was not in Mistress mode, I did not have my mind on playtime or work, but rather in getting paint off of myself and having fun making progress on my new space.
My caller was friendly, introduced himself by name only at first and asked if I remembered him….I felt like a deer in headlights, but I decided to go the road of honesty and tell him no, I didn’t recall off the top of my head. I hated having to admit this..
This darling man then informs me I’ve seen him twice (but when? I wonder to myself) and names one activity we’ve mutually enjoyed.
At this point, I THINK I have the right person in mind, but without a face, I can’t be certain – and I don’t want to guess wrong! I can tell by the sudden down turn in his voice that I’ve slightly hurt his feelings; this is not at all my intention.
In my profession, you simply cannot put much stock in names as many of you give me fake ones to begin with. I don’t mind, I respect your privacy, but sometimes you forget the fake name you gave me, and offer me a new one….and sometimes that new name will conflict the name your email account gives me when I look at who the sender is. Do you see where I’m headed here?
Any given person can have MANY aliases – this also doesn’t include those who go by board handles and nicknames as well. Unfortunately, it’s just a product of the adult industry that a name will almost never bring the right person up in my mind on the first try, and I, like many, would rather not lie about it.
I write this blog entry for one reason, and one reason alone. To reassure you callers that though I may not remember you by your name alone, I will absolutely remember your face – and your fetishes. I’ve often amazed my guests who come back for a 2nd, 3rd or 4th round with me by following up on our topics of discussion and recall exactly how to push their buttons without having to sit down for another pre session talk. A face says it all, and when I’m with you, I’m focusing on YOU the person, not you the name.
I hope my caller forgives me and realizes that I didn’t intend to make him feel slighted.
But more so, I hope all future callers will realize that unless you can provide me a more specific time I last saw you and what we did, I will likely not be able to pick up right where we left off by phone. You’ll have to clue me in.
Also, those that use multiple names, please do me a solid and let’s cut it down to one. I don’t mind what you go by – I have visitors that choose the most laughable (but memorable) names just to have a private chuckle with me when they call. (examples: Diet coke boy, the pirate, piggy, puppy, dick tracy) I enjoy that actually. I like being on the same page as you…. but a real name, a fake name, the name you gave me when you forgot your fake name, the name I gave you in session because it fit you at the time, your board handle and your email address name is all a bit much for me to remember on one person.
It’s really very hard for someone to understand, when you create such a moving experience for them, how you couldn’t remember them. All they understand is that they will never forget you.
Well yes, I do understand and it’s not that I have forgotten them. It’s exactly as my blog says, but in short when you call and say “This is John” – I’ll be caught off guard. Faces I will remember forever!